Jesus has gone down to the lowest quarters of the jail and opened up the door and another prisoner has been released. This sums up my last little healing journey. My experience is that Jesus keeps freeing. I am free, yes, I know that. But Jesus keeps bringing me more freedom as I journey with him.
The latest healing adventure that Jesus took me on was a 2 month ordeal. Near the end of this time and working with a prayer partner God showed me that I was still holding on to some 'legitimacy' baggage. This comes from my adoption and abuse as a young child. As this unfolded God began to show me that I was still trying to prove myself and make sure that those around me knew I belonged on this earth. As I cried out to God to take this burden and asked for his forgiveness He open the door to the cell and gave me a new freedom! Neat-o !!
I'm starting to see a new reality on how God works. It would be all too easy for Him to slam the door shut as I walked out of the jail cell, throw away the key and never return again. I believe the door is still open for me if I choose to return.
A week or so after this new freedom I got a glimpse of going back. My wife and I meet with a newlywed couple once every two weeks and are going through some marriage videos. After dinner I was explaining some differences between men and women. To get my point across I brought it back to Adam and Eve. I stated that when the bible says rib, the original Greek meaning is "a part of" or "side".
The new bride immediately had to check her bible to see if this was true. By no means did she do anything wrong, but what rose up inside of me was shocking. I was angry!!!! "Like seriously... Come on", I thought.
What the enemy was trying to do was to invite me back to the jail cell. This would be just a small step towards it. I am reminded that I DON'T HAVE TO TRY TO PROVE MYSELF.
Today that cell remains empty and the door is still open. Today I have made a choice to stay free and for God to light my path and open my eyes.
I pray that God continues to free and light our paths.
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